Quit telling others to "get over it"

12:55 PM

Five years ago I blogged about that breakup -- the sudden, 4:30 a.m. calling off of the engagement; how my daughter, who was only 13 at the time, was dumbfounded; the dog; the news of his new engagement several months later to a woman who was in our "circle" at the time. (Check out those 2011 posts when you get a chance, mmm-k?) What can I say, I was in love at the time, and guess what? My feelings didn't switch off, like Duke Energy hadn't received my payment yet. 

I remember it was such an emotional time for me, as I was still new to Charlotte and figuring out my next life's steps. So the last thing I wanted was to stay stuck in the past -- although that old past was still fresh at the time, y'all! While I wasn't looking for a pity party host, I wasn't ready for the ultimate brush off from so-called peeps: "Get over it!" 

Well damn...

People back then took it upon themselves to project certain things about me not getting over that in a timely manner, too. That I was more angrier than I really was. Naw, son; it was "they" who made me angrier than I should have been, because they wasn't getting it. I was going to get over it but I needed more than a few weeks. Sheesh! 

I then wrote an argument against how people dismiss others' feelings with a "get over it" suggestion (or a move on, whatever). Like, who gives anyone the right to advise that? Was I taking too long to get over something that happened less than a year ago (at the time)? Really?! Sorry, but I wasn't going to fall in line, stop talking and give fake smiles, to please those who gave maybe 1.5 fuggs about me in the first place. 

And I'm not about to do it today.

I'm five years older. And yes, I am over that, thank God. And yes, as of late my attention has been on a new(ish) man. It's not so much that I wanted to find a new man to get over the old (which is what I am strongly against, because rebound love is the main ingredient to a recipe for disaster...yes I was a chef), but being single-and-happy-and-dating is never a bad thing. Hey! 

But then, the presidential election season happened. And today, I'm not over Senator Bernie Sanders' forced towel throwing. I was disgusted when he finally announced he's "with her", Hillary Clinton. Either I had to fall in line and vow to cast my vote for her, or vote Donald Trump (yeah, no.). "The lesser of two evils..." But I grew cool with it. I don't care for either candidates, still have the option for casting a pointless vote for either Jill Stein of the Green Party, or Gary Johnson of the Libertarian Party, so I could rest well knowing that I don't have to vote for the big two. 

Then, the DNC email scandal happened. Wikileaks revealed that the Dems, Bernie's own damn party, pretty much plotted against Sanders to support Hillary during the primaries. What's funny is that when other Bernie supporters suggested that he was being set up way before the leaks, I didn't want to believe it. "Where were the receipts?" 

They were with Julian Assange and 'em. More receipts to come, too. Wow. But because this year's race to the White House is more crucial than ever, I'm supposed to fall in line and vote for Hills to beat Trump because I'm black and not a rich bish yet. And as far as Bernie goes? "Get over it!"

(Or "Move on!")

Hey guys, here's why you don't have the right to tell us Bernie voters what time it is, literally. First, you don't own our hearts (or what's in it). Honestly, this is all you need to know. You don't own the organ, even if you're a donor. It's no longer yours. Secondly, have you taken your own "get over it" advice? I mean, have you gotten over whatever it is you should have gotten over since Channel U was a thing? Since having a big-azz satellite in your yard was an "I've arrived" moment? Since the first time I rocked natural hair, in the 70s/80s?

I hollered, and I do mean hollered, when I read this meme on FB:

So, thanks in advance for allowing me to shut you down. Stop telling us to get over it, and let me and the others have our moment for as long as we wish. Don't care what the reports say. Don't care what political junkies say. Let us hold on to this Bernie thing for as long as we'd like...before we eventually get over it. SMH

Newsflash: you can always ignore us (read:me) like you've been doing anyway. Your problem, solved.

Eventually, I'll be packing up my toys and going away with my "issues". And maybe, just maybe, I'll fall in line. Maybe I effing won't. Ha! 

But for now, I'm in this sandbox, getting on most of the other kids' last nerves with my complaints, in this July-azz heat*...dodging the sand-throwers...(because, if I get sand thrown on me the way my emotions are set up!!!)... and looking for reasons why I have to get with her

Or why I should not.

*Sidenote: with the heatwave we've been experiencing here in NC, "it's too hot" is now my standard reason for most things for me as of late, like "Bae, talk to you later, 'cause it's too hot!" and "Leave him, girl, 'cause, it's too hot!"

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  1. OMG!!!!! I loathe that saying. Did I say how much I loathe hearing "get over it". It actually makes me want to slap taste buds out of the mouths of the people who have said it. I am recently separated (after being married since 1993 and with him since 1991). I decided back in June that I was done with the whole thing. I had been literally sick about the relationship since early April and knew that the time had come to wash my hands of it. I must say that there were times that I would get extremely sad about the break up (I mean hell, I spent my entire adult life with this man)and I was told on several occasions to "GET OVER IT". Just the thought of hearing it at this very moment makes my teeth itch. I was told that life goes on (as if I didn't know this) and that what doesn't kill me will make me stronger (what the hell?). Who the ham wants to hear these type of comments from people who "care" and "love you". I finally got fed up with one particular "friend" and had to tell her that I will get over it when I get good and damned ready. How about that?????!!!!!!!!