God's will in my singlehood

3:35 PM

Charlotte's weather changes like some people who are questionably bipolar. One morning not too long ago the temps dropped to the upper 20s! In October, yo. Today, Sunday is bright and sunny and the weather has to be in the 70s; some of the residents are wearing shorts but I wouldn't take it that far.

But there is one thing about the town that will not change, regardless of how great the need for a portable heater can be: we go to church. (For those of you in Charlotte reading this: leave Pastor Steven and Elevation Church -- my church -- alone. That is all!) I have to reconnect with my spiritual core with church because...well...you try connecting on a Tuesday in the heat of a stressful workday! So, I too do church in Charlotte.

My relationship with God is one I refuse to take for granted. I look to Him for important decisions,  such as marriage. I let that be known on the Facebook page of an author when I stated that I move on His time and I welcome God's will. What I didn't expect was the questions, toward me and my relationship with God.

In the Mis-Eeducation of Single Men, relationship expert Paul C. Brunson makes a point of how men are so quick to put marriage on the back burner while they get their money right. Maybe God does want us all to marry first, then build a life together. Maybe He doesn't. There is no one answer here. But, there is God's will and I'm rolling with it.

Speaking of answers, when I was asked to explain my "God's will" comment on Paul's FB page, by another author, Namie Bimba, I thought a) she is being too literal for me before 9:00 am, and b) her questions probably won't have the answers she's looking for. When it comes to God and my relationship, outside of the Bible there are no straight answers.

Anywho, I promised that I'd respond to her; here comes the question/answer portion of the program:

How do you define the term "God's will"?
That's easy: it is the will of God. Not my will, but God's will (be done). Enough said. There are times where I think my plan will work, but for some reason it doesn't. It wasn't His will. Remember, He told me to leave that Maryland situation twice because I didn't listen the first time. Things only grew worse for me there, from day--when I became more miserable at work, to night--when...never mind...read the old posts. Thanks.

In sum, God's will, whatever that will is, will be done. Clearly, I can't make it out here without His guidance.

Since everybody's life story is different, in the context of dating/courting or romantic relationship building, how does "God's will" factor in, in a practical way? First of all...practical?!?! Nothing about the Holy Spirit is practical. Unless you don't believe in miracles. Secondly, we shouldn't factor God's will in our lives; we grow into new lives based on His will.

Do people just "wait on God" to bring them a husband while they serve actively in church and other volunteer/philanthropic activities? Everyone's relationship with God is different so some may volunteer while others use their blog -- complete with bizarre stories about CD (read the blog please!) -- to motivate single women to be happy, regardless of our mess. (Pastor Steven spoke about mess being a ministry this weekend, by the way.)

Do (people) date around, getting to know different prospects, to aid in making an informed decision in line with "God's will"?
Again the person-God relationship differs for us all, so does the will of God. Some might not date around. I did. I had to, as crazy as it might sound: I would have never appreciated what I now have if I didn't go through the dating process with those other dudes. Take that last statement anyway you wish. Bless ya heart.

Perhaps the question Namie should have asked is "how do I know what God's will is for my own life?" to which I'll say, you'll just know. Things will not only fall into place, they will stay in place! Just ask all the happily single and married folks out here.

In closing (insert a sigh--this was a long post to write for free!), God's will on my life will not look like that of the next woman's. This is why it's important to get to know Him for yourself, not according to the media, who came for Pastor Steven every night on the news this week (yet, they still air his sermons every Saturday night after Saturday Night Live...bloop!); not based on the follies seen on "Preachers of LA" and definitely minus the thoughts and words of another writer. Take that statement anyway you wish as well. Bless ya heart.

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