The scariest thing about jars

5:30 PM


So I made chicken parm the other night. While the fettuccine was cooking I grabbed a jar of Ragu and went to open it. That jar wouldn't open for nada.

Then I tapped the bottom and shook the jar as I usually do -- and have done since watching the Cosby episode, where Sandra played Elvin (or he played himself lol) by opening the jar.

Watch the full episode -- season 3, episode 3 -- or make your way to 11:20 for the jar scene.


But my jar? It still wouldn't open. Usually it works. Usually I am the one to open jars. Folks give me the jars.

It was still taking too long and as I wondered WTF, it hit me: I have no one to open the jar for me. And I don't even mean a husband but a man who is only mine and not just when we're horny. I have to now date to meet the one, not just the one for now. I'm 40...I am ready for a relationship again.

It's been two years now since I've been in a relationship. It was the the reason for this blog, the demise of that relationship, that is. Here's hoping that the next and FINAL relationship will not result in another blog like this. I'm tired of the dates, more that I've ever been tired of it before. I'm a zombie at dinner now and it makes no sense that I keep wasting time eating with these dudes.

Mr. Not-So-Bad Cop (MNSB)

Earlier this week I met another online dater for din-din, a Mr. T-gold-ring-clad-big-and-tall MNSB, and wow...not only is he a officer of the law, just like RoboCopper, but he's self-absorbed and very opinionated too. (I now believe that narcissism is a requirement for becoming a police man.) He said he was a free spirit, but I am really a free spirit and I saw nothing about myself in him. He talked about himself most of the time. Oh the memories.

The next day he texted me, stating that he had a good time, then asked how I was doing that morning. I shared how I had a cold -- for me, that day sucked, honestly. That mofo had the nerve to say "Feel better, but I hope you didn't pass it to me!", with an "LOL" sprinkled in that text to soften the selfish rant.

Really dude?!

Yeah, so that was last of the pointless dates...

Back to why my dating life as I know it is dying: Last month at church one of the staff members prayed with me. When we were done she said I'll be okay, but noticed "there is something that is in the way that needs to go." Days before that, my mother told me to open the doors to my apt (I have a back door here...hey!) and let whatever spirits is in here, out.

What I thought was fun and a great way to enjoy singledom has now come to a close. I must now date with serious intentions; no more of that justforthehelluvit mentality. It's amazing what a jar of pre-made sauce -- and my memory of the Cosbys -- can bring to light. I now know what spirits needed get ghost...

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