Dateless December?

9:22 AM

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Fellas, action figures...come'ere.

You really need to step up your game. That's right, I said it. YOU -- the minority of the sexes, where in many cities you are almost extinct -- need to step it up in the dating scene. I am annoyed.

Recently my consultant and I celebrated our newly-formed business relationship, yes...binness, with a massive amount of flowers, and a nice dinner where "wait for it" you'll find cloth napkins! And get this: He opened doors: car, restaurant...shoot, he'd probably open the bathroom stall door for me if he were allowed in. If I was attracted to him, we'd both be in trouble.

But noooooooo! Who catches my near-sighted eyes? The good-looking six-footers who claim they want to meet me but are no-shows. One guy had the nerve to not only stand me up, but call me almost two weeks later as if nothing is wrong. Really dude?

Across town there is the man who reached out to me. Typed all day long as if he didn't have a job. Then when it came time to meet...well...I had to reschedule. LOL Sorry but at least I called him ahead of time. And do you really need reservations for Applebees? Anywho, he and I agreed to meet later that day, but he fell asleep. He would keep this pattern going for two weeks. By that time I would put the phone down, on speakerphone, and get some writing done, paint my fingernails, sip wine, anything else that I could manage to multitask while I let this mofo talk me to death about how he is tired on Sundays. (Read: he don't want to drive across town to meet me.)

This fool had the nerve to call me while I was at work after I done told his arse I work second shift, asking if we could "meet and greet" at the Waffle House when I get off work. *throws hands up*. So, he's not trying to impress at all, huh? LOL He's not the only one, that's for sure.

Ugh! Fa-la-la-la-eff it all!

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